Existential Review Part 16 BE REALISTIC by Sasha Lessin, Ph.D.,
sashalessinphd@... 808 244-4103

[Based on Koestenbaum, P., The New Image of the Person: The Theory
and Practice of Clinical Psychology, Connecticut: Greenwood Press, 1978.]

Now that you've familiarized yourself with the ideals in
earlier lessons, continue the exploration of the existential model of
being starting with the next ideal; then share your results on this
site.

BE REALISTIC (Ideal 14)

Distinguish clearly among your self-definition (inwardness.,
subjectivity), what you view as non-self (object, world, other) and
the connection between them (dialogue, dialectic, synthesis). "I
clearly distinguish reality from fantasies, dreams, rationalizations
and wishful thinking. I am always in touch with what is real. (Ego-
cogito-cogitatum). I know that there is a reality beyond my
inwardness. I know that this reality is different from my subjective
ego. I know that this reality may be other people or the objects of
nature, but it can also be my body or my unconscious. I know that
this reality is independent of me. At all times I feel that I am
directly in touch with that external reality. I always sense that I
am in contact with that part of the world which is other than me.
Even while I am rationalizing, deceiving myself, or having fantasies,
I know that what is real is that I am dreaming." [Koestenbaum, op.
cit., pages 514-515]
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Review: THE EXISTENTIAL PRINCIPLES (See each on this site):

Realize the reciprocal INTERPLAY between you and what you
experience; learn of field theory, intentionality.

Experience yourself at several LEVELS OF CONSCIOUSNESS.

Acknowledge that you are responsible; CHOOSE your attitudes
and reactions.

Consciously experience your ever-developing sense of yourself
as an individual and as humanity (phenomenologically SELF-DISCLOSE.)

Value PAIN and ANXIETY as opportunities to learn.

Use limits to make your life meaningful; reflect upon
NEGATION, FINITUDE and DEATH.

Live and reflect using phenomenological bracketing (EPOCHE)

Be INDEPENDENT, SELF-RELIANT and SUBJECTIVE (to balance out
love and commitment.)

Realize your own unique, creative INDIVIDUALITY.

Experience TRANSCENDENTAL SUBJECTIVITY; revere this core self
of each and all consciousness.

Realize you are free to CHOOSE your own values and self-
concepts

Accept GUILT for your choices as signals to do better.

Say YES to life. COMMIT yourself. Be REALISTIC.

LOVE and encounter others. Be FLEXIBLE and adaptable

Experience time living now, using the past, focused on your
future.

GROW; expand and transcend your self-definition.

Use contradictions, polarities, paradoxes and ambiguities as
opportunities to establish dialogues and DIALECTICS leading to
further growth.

sashalessinphd@...